By Amanda Fisher-Katz-Keohane of MySexBio.org
It’s always odd meeting another Amanda. Despite it being one of the most common names in the United States, I can’t shake the feeling that there’s a deeper connection at play. Meeting Amanda Jones, the founder of Kikoko, was no different. The more we spoke, the more our commonalities, both as cannabis and sex-positive businesswomen, came to light.
I’ve been helping develop My Sexual Biography since 2019, and have had the privilege of meeting many inspiring people. Amanda was no exception.
She and Jennifer Chapin founded Kikoko, a femme-focused cannabis tea company, in 2015. Since then, the company has grown astronomically, offering mints, tinctures, and honeys, proving that the future of cannabis, and perhaps sexual wellness, just might be female.
Why Cannabis
The benefits of cannabis are wide-reaching, not least of all being a deeper connection to one’s own sexuality and pleasure.
“We really stay in this business because we know we’re helping people,” Amanda tells me. “We seem to have resonated with women as a trustworthy brand.”
I agree. As a femme-identifying being myself, I felt welcomed, entrusted, and encouraged after perusing Kikoko’s website. Not only was their art remarkable, but there was a substantial focus on education, corporate responsibility and community.
But, I still wondered, how would a cannabis tea enhance my pleasure and “reboot” my sex drive?
Before working at My Sex Bio, I’d never given much thought to my sexual story. By this, I mean, the experiences I’ve had, how they’ve shaped my relationship to my body, sex and pleasure. I’d never taken the time to reflect on those moments and influences.
After doing so, through My Sex Bio’s guided reflections and online workshops, I sensed an
ever-building peace within my heart, mind, and relationships (both sexual and asexual).
However, I still feel like there’s room to grow… I’m aware that my relationship with my body and sexuality is just that: a relationship. It’s never perfect, and it can be tumultuous at times. And, while reflection and conversations around our sexuality are a vital step, I know there are other support systems I could be tapping into.
Sexual Empowerment
“I think my biggest libido inhibitor,” I tellAmanda, “is the distraction caused by my mind during sex; anxious thoughts, lack of self-confidence, and the like. I’ve tried to use cannabis as a means of calming my mind. Do you think cannabis is going to play a role in this ever-growing concept of mindful sex?”
“Oh, absolutely,” says Jones. “You feel more connected to yourself; you feel more connected to your partner, because you’re more present. And, frankly, it helps ease the anxiety of getting undressed. It enables you to be more honest and accepting of yourself, whether or not you’re having sex.
“It slows me down. It allows me to be present. It allows me to focus on my partner, to be more focused on my own needs, and speak up to what you need in bed. And, I think that aligns with what you’re working on, which I applaud very much. It’s women owning their sexuality.”
Her words hit deep. It’s what we’re all about at My Sex Bio. In offering educational and empowering resources for sexual reflection, we aim to provide people with the skills to command their sexual stories.
“It’s so important,” I agree, “that people have the knowledge, skills, and support to communicate effectively to achieve their ultimate pleasure.”
Amanda nods. “And, if cannabis can help at every age, which it really does, that’s fantastic.”
Barriers to Entry
While the idea seems so perfect – this one simple and natural resource that can tune us into our body, make us more present and amplify the pleasure we feel both in and out of the bedroom – both sex and cannabis are still enveloped in taboo.
At My Sex Bio, we’ve run into roadblock after roadblock. Social media platforms don’t let us run ads because sex for pleasure is a banned conversation topic. We can only refer to sex in regards to specific preventative education.
“Women are still not saying ‘I need help with sex.’ They’re just not owning up to that. We actually had to rebrand our Sensuali-Tea because it was our worst-selling tea. It’s helpful for so many things, but for sex, it’s absolutely fantastic.”
According to a Journal of Sexual Medicine study, women who use cannabis report over twice as many satisfactory orgasms as those who don’t.
“And yet,” Amanda continues, “women still don’t want to talk about it. Women your age do, but I don’t think they’re thinking about cannabis as a big help. These are big hurdles we have to overcome… (a) admitting that we need help with our sex lives and not feeling ashamed about that; and (b) recognizing that cannabis can help with all that.”
“I’ve become quite the loud spokesperson about this. I think it’s very important that we’re all in this together and that it doesn’t mean you’ve had a bad sex life.
It just means that maybe you can have a better one,” Amanda says.
From one Amanda to another, I join her in that mission and will continue on as a fellow “loud spokesperson” myself.
